I don't normally look at actual dwarfs/midgets in this blog - but this is a great survey of that noble Mexican tradition - midget wrestling...
Above is my personal favourity, Tzuki, who comes in at 3ft 7ins.
Sunday, 25 July 2010
Monday, 19 July 2010
Is height difference at the root of the Gallagher brothers' differences?
I have a theory on why Noel and Liam Gallagher hate each other.
Consider the two men. Liam is the swaggering front man, coming in at around 5ft 9ins. Then there is Noel, the chap who wrote all the hits, measuring about two inches less. That puts Noel on the cusp of shortness, with Liam is stuck stranded in mid-size hell.
And there we have the dynamic of the relationship. The short one, with the talent, versus the mid-sized one, doing his best with the ungainly body size he has been handed.
What makes this even worse for Liam is that he has modelled himself on short men - namely, Richard Ashcroft from The Verve and Ian Brown from The Stone Roses. Two men for whom boasting goes hand-in-hand with songwriting genius.
Of course, Liam has tried to write songs. I believe he had a stab at one or two on the later Oasis albums. But a decent tune - a Live Forever, or a Slide Away - will forever elude him. Now, in his late-30s, he is to be found roaming the streets of Primrose Hill, forever angry, forever jealous of his more gifted sibling.
He has set up a new band, Beady Eye, which he boldly claims will be better than Oasis. But I think we can make our judgement now, before any tunes have been heard. Liam will never write a great song, or even one that drunk northerners will bellow at their birds in pubs.
Why? He was - and pity him for this - born too tall.
Wednesday, 7 July 2010
Short man stands on tip toes for photo shock!!!
Justin Rego, star of hit show The Bachelorette is snapped in this blogger's photo committing one of the gravest sins of shortmandom - he is standing on tiptoes.
I feel personally ashamed seeing Justin standing there, acting like a man of average height, when in fact he is a shorty. Mr Rego, you are not only making a fool of yourself, but short men everywhere. Harrumph, is what I say. And we won't even comment on the very suspect facial hair.
For the full report, go to the blogger herself.
Sunday, 4 July 2010
Introducing my new favourite rapper...shorty!
The more I look at this short man issue, the more I think that, like homosexuality and race, most of the problems are in the past.
The short man in middle age - Tom Cruise or Nicholas Sarkozy, for instance - spend their time in boosted heels while forcing their women to walk bowlegged in flat shoes.
They have been brought up battling against their shortness. They see it as something to fight against, trying far too hard to prove to men of mediocre height that they are better than them.
Now, in 2010, the younger generation of short man seems to relish their shortness - to parade it for the advantage it is.
Take the grime scene. We have two men at the top of the game whose name is suggestive of diminutive height - Tinchy Stryder and Tinie Tempah.
But now we have a fellow who does away with that coy approach. Yes, I want to introduce my new favourite grime artiste - simply known as Shorty.
Shorty is clearly a man on the up. He has been part of the BBK (Boy Better Know) crew for some time, and this summer is launching his solo career. Kindly, for his taller colleagues, he allows them a run-out on his video. They lollop around behind him, in a manner reminiscent of a group of big friendly giants, just happy to part of Shorty's scene.
Needless to say, Shorty has an excess of gusto, and a fine rhyme style.
Find him here...
http://mrtremix.com/2010/06/28/shorty-bbk-offical-video/
The short man in middle age - Tom Cruise or Nicholas Sarkozy, for instance - spend their time in boosted heels while forcing their women to walk bowlegged in flat shoes.
They have been brought up battling against their shortness. They see it as something to fight against, trying far too hard to prove to men of mediocre height that they are better than them.
Now, in 2010, the younger generation of short man seems to relish their shortness - to parade it for the advantage it is.
Take the grime scene. We have two men at the top of the game whose name is suggestive of diminutive height - Tinchy Stryder and Tinie Tempah.
But now we have a fellow who does away with that coy approach. Yes, I want to introduce my new favourite grime artiste - simply known as Shorty.
Shorty is clearly a man on the up. He has been part of the BBK (Boy Better Know) crew for some time, and this summer is launching his solo career. Kindly, for his taller colleagues, he allows them a run-out on his video. They lollop around behind him, in a manner reminiscent of a group of big friendly giants, just happy to part of Shorty's scene.
Needless to say, Shorty has an excess of gusto, and a fine rhyme style.
Find him here...
http://mrtremix.com/2010/06/28/shorty-bbk-offical-video/
Tuesday, 29 June 2010
My top 10 short men
Top 10 short men as of June 2010
1. Napoleon
2. Maradona
3. Sisqo
4. Javier Mascherano
5. Andrew Carnegie
6. Dudley Moore
7. Aston from JLS
8. Tinie Tempah (not sure of height, but clearly not a big guy)
9. Jermain Defoe
10. Prince
1. Napoleon
2. Maradona
3. Sisqo
4. Javier Mascherano
5. Andrew Carnegie
6. Dudley Moore
7. Aston from JLS
8. Tinie Tempah (not sure of height, but clearly not a big guy)
9. Jermain Defoe
10. Prince
Those under 5ft 9 dominate World Cup
Needless to say, the players of the World Cup so far have all been the short guys.
Messi has been typically brilliant, Tevez tonked in one from 30 yards on Sunday, and Diego Maradona has been receiving rave reviews because of his touchline antics and abuse of Pele. And my personal favourite, Javier Mascherano, has been biting into tackles like the cynical beast he is.
David Villa has just scored his fourth of the tournament and looks set to pick up the Golden Boot.
Even Jermain Defoe managed to score for England when he got a chance to start a match.
Meanwhile, lumbering oafs like Emile Heskey, Cristiano Ronaldo and Fernando Torres have consistently failed to make an impact. Why? The long season? Or the fact that they are overrated and always fail to achieve at the highest level?
It particularly pleases me to see Ronaldo failing. He remains an easy target, but any man who blames his opponent for being small as the reason why he got elbowed in the teeth (see blogs past) is surely a man who needs his comeuppance at the hands of Villa and Iniesta.
Such a shame to see him wasting his time playing football when he could be doing something useful like apple picking, or reaching up to high shelves in libraries.
Messi has been typically brilliant, Tevez tonked in one from 30 yards on Sunday, and Diego Maradona has been receiving rave reviews because of his touchline antics and abuse of Pele. And my personal favourite, Javier Mascherano, has been biting into tackles like the cynical beast he is.
David Villa has just scored his fourth of the tournament and looks set to pick up the Golden Boot.
Even Jermain Defoe managed to score for England when he got a chance to start a match.
Meanwhile, lumbering oafs like Emile Heskey, Cristiano Ronaldo and Fernando Torres have consistently failed to make an impact. Why? The long season? Or the fact that they are overrated and always fail to achieve at the highest level?
It particularly pleases me to see Ronaldo failing. He remains an easy target, but any man who blames his opponent for being small as the reason why he got elbowed in the teeth (see blogs past) is surely a man who needs his comeuppance at the hands of Villa and Iniesta.
Such a shame to see him wasting his time playing football when he could be doing something useful like apple picking, or reaching up to high shelves in libraries.
Monday, 21 June 2010
David Villa scores wonder goal, then gets patronised by ITV commentary team
David Villa (5ft 9ins) tonight scored the goal of the World Cup so far, slaloming past two Honduras defenders before belting the ball into the top corner.
But for ITV commentator Peter Drury this was a perfect opportunity to patronise the short man (as a footballer, Villa at 5ft 9ins is small).
Drury, the cretin, said, 'He [Villa] had to beat two defenders, both of whom were twice his size, and he made them both look very small.'
So despite David Villa being perhaps the most prolific striker in the world today, Drury could not envisage him taking on, and beating, two defenders, even if they were from a low-ranked country such as Honduras.
Perhaps Drury should put the matter to Villa at the next Spain press conference.
Drury: So, David, you scored a great goal. Were you surprised you managed to take on two such big defenders, considering how small you are?
Villa: No.
Drury: But surely you must have been? I mean, you are tiny, and they are giants! It was incredible!
Villa: (rolling his eyes). Next question.
But for ITV commentator Peter Drury this was a perfect opportunity to patronise the short man (as a footballer, Villa at 5ft 9ins is small).
Drury, the cretin, said, 'He [Villa] had to beat two defenders, both of whom were twice his size, and he made them both look very small.'
So despite David Villa being perhaps the most prolific striker in the world today, Drury could not envisage him taking on, and beating, two defenders, even if they were from a low-ranked country such as Honduras.
Perhaps Drury should put the matter to Villa at the next Spain press conference.
Drury: So, David, you scored a great goal. Were you surprised you managed to take on two such big defenders, considering how small you are?
Villa: No.
Drury: But surely you must have been? I mean, you are tiny, and they are giants! It was incredible!
Villa: (rolling his eyes). Next question.
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